I spent a full year trying to make my Netherlands dream a reality. Spring of freshman year, I started talking to Dr. Newman-Norlund, who studied in a small southern town in the Netherlands, about perhaps going abroad to meet his colleagues and attend some lectures. Our first email correspondences with the Dutch researchers began a few months later in September of 2014. At the time, I was just beginning my second research project, which focused on validating the computer games that Dr. Newman-Norlund created to teach social skills to children. One problem we were facing was that only Dr. Newman-Norlund and I were experimenting with the games, and we needed more opinions on how to improve them while they were still so new. We came up with an awesome idea; I could go to the Netherlands to discuss the games with several researchers in different fields with the goal of returning back home with tons of suggestions and variations that could make the games more applicable.
Here is my Exsc 351 paper. Check out all those collaborative sources! |
It was a busy year for me in several areas of my life. I skipped my sophomore year and jumped right into being an upper level motor development student, took a peer leadership position as a Magellan Ambassador, and was struggling with getting my independent research project off the ground. One of my classes particularly influenced my research, and that was Exsc 351, Acquisition of Motor Skills. In this class, we really focused on writing a major research paper, and I learned a ton about what makes research valid, accurate, and “good.” Before then, I never had to seek out research and evaluate the sources, so this course was a challenge. However, this new knowledge helped me understand how important collaborative research is, and it encouraged me to pursue my research abroad. Going to the Netherlands would put me in a situation to talk and workshop with professors of various fields, and this idea of gaining information from multiple sources was promoted in Exsc 351. In this class, I had to design a way to teach a skill to a physical therapy patient and write a research paper on each aspect of the activity. This was a very challenging assignment for me because the sources were difficult to find. I discovered that research designs are all very unique and important, and you can come up with relatable conclusions by compiling multiple sources which use different methods. I have included my paper here, and as you can see, the sources range in length, detail, procedure, and results, but I was able to use them together to create a plan for my theorized patient. While writing the paper, I contemplated how useful it would be to use this method in my own field, and this gave me a push to make connections with a variety of experts in the Netherlands.
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Every spare minute I had was dedicated to drafting my proposals for the Magellan Scholar and Mini Grant, which were to fund my trip to the Netherlands. In December 2014, I received word that I was awarded the Mini Grant and denied the Scholar.
I felt like the idea of the Netherlands had burrowed itself into my mind so deep that I couldn’t just give it up. I had never been there, didn’t really know what I would be doing there, and didn’t know one word of Dutch, but the desire to go on this trip weighed on me and created an aching anxiety in my gut. I reached out to the Office of Undergraduate Research right after the rejection for help rewriting my proposal, and I met with an extraordinary advisor several times over the course of the next two months. I submitted my final draft while crying, restless and tired of writing about this project. I was still very unsure about whether or not I would get the grant, so I came up with a backup plan to get funded. I met with the Office of Research (a different office which handles a higher level of research on campus) and discussed a new crowdfunding platform that USC had just started a relationship with. Experiment.com was a website where I could write all about my project and post a video to raise money from family, friends, and strangers. USC’s involvement meant that they would match my funds dollar for dollar until I met my goal.
I made the Experiment.com webpage (complete with a bio video I filmed on my phone one Friday afternoon), but waited to make it go live until I heard back from the Scholar. One morning at 8:25, my teacher was about to start class when I got my “Congratulations!” email on my phone. I ran out of the room, shaking like a leaf, and called my mom. Outside of the Pettigru building, I cried tears of absolute joy over the phone. My trip was going to be a reality! The board believed in my ability and my project, and I was awarded the full grant. That moment was surreal, and I don’t remember anything that happened during that class.
I followed through with the Experiment.com site, and ended up raising all the money I was asking for. The week that my campaign ended, my hard drive also crashed, and I was an emotional wreck. April was filled with sleepless nights in and out of the library computer lab, and the reality of the trip set in. What the heck was I doing? I couldn’t go to the Netherlands by myself for over a month! When I reminisce on May 2015, I can feel the waves of nausea, remember the shaking at night, and relive the intense doubts in my mind. I was thrilled to have been given the chance to go on the trip, but completely terrified about what that all entailed.
I felt like the idea of the Netherlands had burrowed itself into my mind so deep that I couldn’t just give it up. I had never been there, didn’t really know what I would be doing there, and didn’t know one word of Dutch, but the desire to go on this trip weighed on me and created an aching anxiety in my gut. I reached out to the Office of Undergraduate Research right after the rejection for help rewriting my proposal, and I met with an extraordinary advisor several times over the course of the next two months. I submitted my final draft while crying, restless and tired of writing about this project. I was still very unsure about whether or not I would get the grant, so I came up with a backup plan to get funded. I met with the Office of Research (a different office which handles a higher level of research on campus) and discussed a new crowdfunding platform that USC had just started a relationship with. Experiment.com was a website where I could write all about my project and post a video to raise money from family, friends, and strangers. USC’s involvement meant that they would match my funds dollar for dollar until I met my goal.
I made the Experiment.com webpage (complete with a bio video I filmed on my phone one Friday afternoon), but waited to make it go live until I heard back from the Scholar. One morning at 8:25, my teacher was about to start class when I got my “Congratulations!” email on my phone. I ran out of the room, shaking like a leaf, and called my mom. Outside of the Pettigru building, I cried tears of absolute joy over the phone. My trip was going to be a reality! The board believed in my ability and my project, and I was awarded the full grant. That moment was surreal, and I don’t remember anything that happened during that class.
I followed through with the Experiment.com site, and ended up raising all the money I was asking for. The week that my campaign ended, my hard drive also crashed, and I was an emotional wreck. April was filled with sleepless nights in and out of the library computer lab, and the reality of the trip set in. What the heck was I doing? I couldn’t go to the Netherlands by myself for over a month! When I reminisce on May 2015, I can feel the waves of nausea, remember the shaking at night, and relive the intense doubts in my mind. I was thrilled to have been given the chance to go on the trip, but completely terrified about what that all entailed.
Check out my crowdfunding site:
https://experiment.com/projects/understanding-teamwork-using-computer-games
The day came. I was in Amsterdam within 18 hours of leaving Greenville. In an exhausted daze, I managed to find the right trains to get myself to Nijmegen, where I was greeted by my host and lead into the room they had prepared for me. I slept for hours, and when I awoke, the months of fear were just… gone. I had made it.
The Netherlands trip transformed me because it showed me that “I can do it.” Whatever that “it” may be, I have the skills necessary and the head on my shoulders to help me navigate a new and unexpected world. It showed me the niceness of other people, the willingness of strangers to take in newcomers, and my own inner abilities. This trip was completely and entirely me; no other students, mentors, or supervisors while I was there- and it worked out beautifully. In this entirely new country, I was fully myself. As a student, I could acknowledge there was a lot more to learn, and I didn’t feel pressured to be an expert. Of course I learned theory and research practices, but the trip was an entire ocean beyond the classroom learning. |
Here is my successful Magellan Scholar Application and a bunch of pictures! From left to right: one of the families I stayed with in Nijmegen; a plate of delicious Dutch food; touring the Dutch windmills; Amsterdam's beautiful canals.
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Of course, even while in the Netherlands, I had lingering doubts in my mind about the importance of my psychology based projects. I had a nagging guilt that by funding my project, less funds were going to research in something like curing cancer. This type of thinking had begun when I was in my Psych 440 class, Survey of Personality. Sometimes in that classes, it seemed like nothing was concrete or actually proven, and we were just talking in circles about different theories. Even with my work, I was concerned that I wasn’t helping prove anything or create major impacts in academia because I was just looking at one specific computer game that might not even make it in the long run. While in the Netherlands, I listened to a presentation about the difference between basic and applied science, and why both types can be extremely useful to the scientific community. The presenter mentioned that sometimes it seems like psychology research especially is somewhat intuitive or useless, and our funds should really be going to something more concrete. He dispelled that sort of thinking by discussing how crucial the basic, soft sciences are to understanding our world. I gained a new insight about the beauty of basic science; research that helps grow the body of knowledge in whatever topic may not directly cure cancer, but it can help us better understand the world we live in. In this way, social science research (including the projects I have focused on) is extremely useful and justified because it expands our knowledge about the human person.
This all relates back to my “I can do it!” thought because it allowed me to realize that I can pursue any sort of concept or question through research; I can learn whatever I want to learn, and I don’t have to be constrained to science with huge applications. I have the freedom to explore and discover whatever I’m interested in because it is all important; research about computer games is just as valid as research about cancer.
By traveling and researching in the Netherlands, I broke boundaries physically and mentally. I discovered my own capabilities and independence with this trip, and I came back excited at the possibilities that my future holds.
This all relates back to my “I can do it!” thought because it allowed me to realize that I can pursue any sort of concept or question through research; I can learn whatever I want to learn, and I don’t have to be constrained to science with huge applications. I have the freedom to explore and discover whatever I’m interested in because it is all important; research about computer games is just as valid as research about cancer.
By traveling and researching in the Netherlands, I broke boundaries physically and mentally. I discovered my own capabilities and independence with this trip, and I came back excited at the possibilities that my future holds.
[Artifacts: Within the Classroom: Exsc 351 Paper. Beyond the Classroom: Experiment.com, Magellan Scholar Application, pictures, report, Discovery Day presentation]